"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.The apostle Paul takes nine verses to speak about the husbands duty as protector, provider, and pastor for the wife; and only three verses to talk about the wife's responsibility to her husband. Husbands are to love their wives in a self-sacrificing way. To give ourselves up for our wives. The reality is that I (we as husbands and men) need to come to this kind of understanding if I want my marriage to not only work, but be spectacular!
I need to put my wife's needs above my own and I need to love her. It's important that I meditate on what it means to lay my life down for my wife. It all begins with my understanding of the love and self-sacrifice that God has made by sending Jesus to be my substitute. When I'm able to wrap my mind and heart around the ultimate sacrifice that was made for my salvation, for God's plan of reconciliation to affect me, then and only then will I know how to love my wife. When I experience what the cross meant to the Father and to the Son, then giving up my life for the one I love most on this planet isn't actually that impossible. I know that because I'm in a constant state of Sanctification, though not perfect yet, God has equipped me to sacrifice what is most important to my flesh for my wife. I know I will not always do this perfectly, but thanks to the work of the Holy Spirit, I'm actually getting better (by God's grace and my wife's willingness to push through the difficult things).
If (and that's the big word), if I can love my wife and sacrifice my fleshly wants for material things, physical/sexual desires, and emotional needs, then I have taken the first step in leading her as pastor, protector and provider. Paul's point is that Biblical Submission becomes less of "I have to do this" and more of "I get to do this." Paul seems to lay this out as cause and effect. Submission to the husbands lead will flow out of the wife's love for Jesus, Scripture, and her husband.
My encouragement this week is to take some time and meditate on what it means to love and sacrifice myself for my wife. Ask God to reveal what this kind of love looks like in the life of the Christians husband. How do I love my wife?
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